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ELA: Revising/Editing Part A

Whole-passage revision: the claim that opens it, the details that earn their place, the arrow each transition draws, and the order that makes it read.

17 topics · 66 questions

Each topic is a path, not a menu: work down it in order and every question builds on the one above. Click any of them to watch the answer draw itself.

How Revising/Editing Part A Works

  1. How it worksHow do the SHSAT's whole-passage revision items plant errors: language misuse, stray details, weak transitions, weak openers, and bad order?
  2. How it worksHow does a question about sentence 8 pull you back into sentences 7 and 9 before you can answer it?
  3. Common mistakeWhy doesn't the choice that repairs a grammar mistake win a whole-passage revision question about organization?
  4. Going furtherWhat happens when two answer choices are both true but only one of them develops the writer's claim?
Your turneasy1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. (1) The bike club at Hillside Middle School meets in the old shop room every Thursday afternoon. (2) Last year the club repaired 51 bikes and gave them to students who had no other way to get to school. (3) The shop room is cold in winter, and two of the ceiling lights flicker. (4) This year the members hope to repair 125 bikes, and a hardware store has promised to donate tools. The writer wants to improve the ORGANIZATION of the paragraph. Which revision best does that?

Reading the Passage Before the Questions

  1. How it worksHow does one careful read of a whole passage build the outline you need to place a moved sentence?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through reading a four-paragraph passage once and writing a three-word label on each paragraph.
  3. Common mistakeWhy isn't skimming for grammar mistakes a good plan when most whole-passage questions ask about ideas?
  4. Going furtherWhat happens to your reading plan when the clock shows twelve minutes left and two passage sets still to go?
Your turnmedium1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. (1) Monarch butterflies fly from Canada to central Mexico each fall. (2) The trip covers as much as 2696 miles. (3) No single butterfly makes the whole round trip. (4) It takes 4 generations to come back north in the spring. A student who reads only sentence 3 wants to delete it. Should sentence 3 be kept?

Introducing the Main Claim

  1. How it worksHow does a main claim have to cover every paragraph that follows it, like a lid sized to the pot?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through choosing between 'Gap years help some students succeed' and 'Gap years guarantee success' as a passage claim.
  3. Common mistakeWhy isn't the most confident-sounding sentence the claim when the writer later admits the idea is not for everyone?
  4. Common mistakeWhy doesn't a true statement about one paragraph work as the claim for a passage with four of them?
Your turnmedium1 of 3
Read the paragraphs, then answer the question. [Introductory sentence] A gap year can teach a student to manage money, since 77 percent of those who take one work for pay. A gap year can also cost a family money, and a student who works for a year may find it hard to return to studying. About 90 percent of students who defer their admission do enroll the following fall, so most, though not all, come back. Which sentence best introduces the main claim of the whole passage?

Introductory Statements That Set Up a Paragraph

  1. How it worksHow does a good opening sentence promise exactly what the rest of the paragraph will deliver?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through picking an opener for a paragraph whose next three sentences all describe what a gap year costs.
  3. Going furtherWhat changes about an opening line when the paragraph it opens is the last one in the piece?
Your turneasy1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. [Opening sentence] A one-year pass for a shared workspace runs about 1527 dollars. Travel insurance adds a few hundred more. A student who plans to volunteer abroad may also pay 1119 dollars for a plane ticket. Which sentence best introduces this paragraph?

Concluding Statements That Land

  1. How it worksHow does a real closing sentence reach back to the main claim instead of adding a brand-new idea?
  2. Common mistakeWhy isn't repeating the opening sentence word for word a usable conclusion?
  3. Worked exampleWalk me through choosing a closing line for an argument that city rooftops should be planted as gardens.
  4. Going furtherWhat happens to a conclusion that introduces a fresh statistic no earlier sentence prepared you for?
Your turnmedium1 of 3
Read the passage, then answer the question. The writer has argued that city rooftops should be planted as gardens. The passage has shown that a planted roof cools the floors below by as much as 10 degrees, that it holds back 59 percent of the rain that would otherwise flood the storm drains, and that schools can grow food on one. [Concluding sentence] Which sentence best concludes the passage?

Introducing a Counterclaim

  1. How it worksHow does a counterclaim sentence raise an opposing idea so the paragraph can knock it down with evidence?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through why 'Some opponents worry that students who take a job may never return' opens a paragraph that refutes it.
  3. Common mistakeWhy isn't a sentence that extends the writer's own argument a counterclaim, even when it sounds balanced?
  4. Common mistakeWhy doesn't a counterclaim opener belong in a paragraph that never answers the objection it raises?
Your turnmedium1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. The writer is arguing that students should be allowed to take a gap year. [Opening sentence of paragraph 3] In fact, 92 percent of students who defer their admission enroll the following fall. Colleges that track deferrals report that those students finish their degrees at about the same rate as everyone else, and only 7 percent withdraw before sophomore year. Which sentence best introduces this paragraph?

Supporting Details Versus Details That Wander

  1. How it worksHow do you test a detail against a paragraph's point by asking what it actually proves?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through testing 'Succeeding in college is hard at first' against a paragraph about how a break builds skills.
  3. Common mistakeWhy isn't an interesting fact worth keeping when the paragraph around it is about something else?
Your turneasy1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. (1) A year away from school can build skills a classroom does not reach. (2) A student who works a register learns to count change under pressure. (3) One who volunteers on a trail crew learns to finish a job with 12 strangers. (4) Surveys find that 83 percent of gap-year students say they got better at planning their own time. Which sentence, if added after sentence 4, would best support the paragraph's point?

The Unnecessary Sentence

  1. How it worksHow does deleting a sentence and rereading its neighbors prove whether it was doing any work?
  2. Common mistakeWhy doesn't restating an idea in different words count as supporting that idea?
  3. Worked exampleWalk me through deciding which line to cut from a solar-panel paragraph that suddenly mentions wind turbines.
  4. Going furtherWhat happens when the sentence you want to delete is the only one carrying a number?
Your turneasy1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. (1) Solar panels on a school roof cut the building's electric bill. (2) The panels at Rivera Middle School produce about 579 kilowatt-hours on a clear day. (3) Wind turbines are another way for a district to make its own power. (4) Over a year, the panels save the school roughly 7245 dollars. Which sentence should be deleted?

The Missing Supporting Detail

  1. How it worksHow do you find that hole by stacking each claim against the evidence sitting under it?
  2. Common mistakeWhy isn't a vivid description the right addition when what the paragraph is missing is a measurement?
  3. Worked exampleWalk me through choosing a detail to add to a paragraph claiming school gardens raise student attendance.
  4. Going furtherWhat changes when the missing detail has to slot between two sentences already joined by 'however'?
Your turnmedium1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. (1) The school garden has raised attendance among the students who work in it. (2) The 34 garden club members plant in April and harvest through October. (3) The club meets on Tuesday and Thursday mornings, 29 weeks a year, before the first bell. (4) Teachers say the students seem proud of the beds they keep. Which sentence, if added after sentence 4, best supports the paragraph's claim?

Transitional Words and Phrases

  1. How it worksHow do the two sentences on either side of a transition decide which transition is legal there?
  2. How it worksHow do contrast, cause, addition, and example transitions each draw a different arrow between the same two ideas?
  3. Worked exampleWalk me through choosing the transition for 'The soil was poor. The tomatoes grew anyway.'
  4. Common mistakeWhy isn't 'in addition' safe to drop in whenever two sentences happen to sit next to each other?
Your turneasy1 of 3
Read the sentences, then answer the question. The soil in the lot was poor, and a test showed only 2 percent organic matter. [ ] the tomatoes produced 211 pounds of fruit that summer. Which transition best fills the blank?

Transitions That Point the Wrong Way

  1. How it worksHow does covering a transition and naming the relationship underneath it catch the wrong one?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through repairing 'Batteries got cheaper; nevertheless, electric buses spread quickly.'
  3. Going furtherWhat changes when the wrong transition opens a paragraph instead of sitting inside one?
  4. Common mistakeWhy doesn't a transition become correct just because the sentence reads smoothly out loud?
Your turneasy1 of 3
Read the sentence, then answer the question. Batteries for electric buses fell from 809 dollars a kilowatt-hour to about 165; nevertheless, cities bought them quickly. Which revision best repairs the sentence?

Transitional Sentences Between Paragraphs

  1. How it worksHow does a bridge sentence hold the last paragraph's idea in one hand and the next paragraph's in the other?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through writing a bridge between a paragraph on the skills a gap year builds and one on its price.
  3. Common mistakeWhy isn't the word 'also' at the head of a paragraph the same thing as a real transitional sentence?
Your turnmedium1 of 3
Read the two paragraphs, then answer the question. Paragraph 2 ends: A student who spends a year on a trail crew or behind a register learns to plan, to show up, and to finish. Surveys find 84 percent report a gain in confidence. Paragraph 3 begins: [ ] A year of travel and insurance can cost a family 9543 dollars, and a deferred student pays no tuition but earns no credit either. Which sentence best begins paragraph 3?

Confusing or Illogical Organization

  1. How it worksHow does resequencing sentences so each one picks up the one before it make a paragraph readable?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through reordering four sentences about a rescue when the outcome is sitting in the second slot.
  3. Common mistakeWhy isn't time order always the right order for a paragraph explaining a scientific idea?
  4. Going furtherWhat changes when the paragraphs themselves are out of sequence rather than the sentences inside one?
  5. Ties togetherHow does spotting a passage's organization when you revise connect to answering a text-structure question when you read?
Your turnmedium1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. (1) A hiker slipped on the ridge trail and could not walk. (2) By nightfall the rescue team had carried her 6 miles down to the road. (3) Her brother climbed to a bare rock and finally found a signal. (4) The call reached the ranger station at 36 minutes past four. How should the sentences be reordered?

Where a Sentence Belongs

  1. How it worksHow do the pronouns and transitions inside a sentence tell you exactly which sentence it has to follow?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through placing 'They repeated it twice more' in a paragraph where only one line mentions a trial.
  3. Common mistakeWhy isn't the spot that sounds fine when read aloud always the right home for a moved sentence?
  4. Going furtherWhat happens to the two sentences on either side of a gap once you slide a new one between them?
Your turnmedium1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. (1) A class wanted to know whether plants grow faster under blue light. (2) Students set 20 seedlings under blue bulbs and 20 more under white ones. (3) The blue group had grown 5 centimeters taller after three weeks. (4) The class reported the result at the science fair in May. Where should the sentence 'They repeated it twice more, with new seedlings each time.' be added?

The Most Precise Language

  1. How it worksHow does trading a vague noun for named examples shrink the range of things a reader can picture?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through picking the most precise revision of 'The machine did a lot of things to the sample.'
  3. Common mistakeWhy isn't the longest answer choice automatically the most precise one?
  4. Common mistakeWhy doesn't piling on adjectives like 'very useful' make a sentence more precise?
Your turneasy1 of 3
Read the sentence, then answer the question. During the 37-minute run the machine did a lot of things to the sample. Which revision uses the most precise language?

Language Misuse Across a Passage

  1. How it worksHow does the first paragraph set a register that every later word choice has to match?
  2. Worked exampleWalk me through repairing 'The researchers were super pumped about the data' in a science article.
  3. Common mistakeWhy isn't a word wrong merely for being simple, when the writing is aimed at a broad audience?
  4. Going furtherWhat happens when 'it' shows up three paragraphs after the thing that 'it' is supposed to name?
Your turneasy1 of 3
Read the paragraph, then answer the question. The study followed 479 adolescents for two years. Participants recorded their sleep in a nightly log. The researchers were super pumped about the data, which showed that bedtimes drifted later by about 31 minutes each school year. Which revision best fits the language of the passage?

Working a Passage Set

  1. How it worksHow does the bookmark let you park a hard question and come back before the set closes for good?
  2. How it worksHow do the highlighter and the line reader mask cut a long text down to the part one question asks about?
  3. Worked exampleWalk me through spending nine minutes on a passage set of three questions and two hundred words.
  4. Going furtherWhat happens to a bookmarked question the moment you advance to the next passage set?
Your turneasy1 of 3
Read the situation, then answer the question. A revising passage set has 4 questions attached to one 200-word passage. You have answered the first two. On the third you have narrowed the choices to two and cannot decide. The clock shows 96 minutes left in the whole test. What is the best move?